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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Also understand that this is not temporary because of grief. At that age, spousal loss is often the trigger to terminal decline. You’ll save yourself a lot of pain and regret, OP, if you start planning for that now.
[/quote]

I actually disagree with this. Yes, this is a possibility - but by my math, this man lost his wife of 50 years THREE MONTHS ago. That is still incredibly recent and fresh. It's also right in the timeline when everyone else (friends, neighbors, meal train, "anything I can do to help") has all dried up, you're just left sitting there with your still very fresh grief. I mean, sheesh, it took me considerably longer to get over some breakups in high school! OP, I would try to be there for him as much as you possibly can for the next 3-9 months and see how it goes. Yes, if you need to set limits for your sanity, do it, but after just three months, this is NOT your new normal. Also see what other resources you can bring in - are there neighbors or old friends who can call him once a week to take the pressure off you? Can you and your brother divide and conquer on the phone calls so he hears from one of you each day? As you get closer to a year from your mom's death, you can reevaluate and start thinking about the long term.

Sorry about your mom, and the added stress. [/quote]

PP jumping in to add - I can't believe how many people are advocating a nursing home (!!) and anti-anxiety medication for a healthy 72 year old who is freshly grieving and needs some emotional support. That's all a HUGE overreaction to someone who, by all signs, is just adjusting to a dramatically new normal. [/quote]

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