Reply to How do I get over having high expectations of others?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm realizing I have this problem where I have high expectations of how others should act in a situation and then when they don't do what I think they should do,I am so disappointed.

For example, my mom had a major surgery recently and I was talking with a friend about it a few days before. I was texting them about it, talking about the surgery, when it was , how worried I was,etc.

Well,the surgery came and went and I never heard a peep from this friend.no 'how did it go,how are you doing?'

This is so ridiculous because they have a life,and probably just forgot or it just wasn't important. But I'm left feeling so sad about it. I know I should just call them up but I feel like,why am I even bothering?

I'm realizing I do this more than is probably healthy. I definitely keep score in my head of things people do /don't do.mostly small things like,oh I never got a thank you for that gift I sent,etc. I don't hold grudges but I definitely remember these things.

In this case though this was a major thing for me and I was telling them before how worried I was,and then to have them never follow up makes me wonder if I should just cut my losses and realize that I now realize where I actually stand as far as friendship with this person. It probably doesn't help that my mom's recovery was really challenging and I could have really used the support of even a quick,'how are you doing?' text or call.

I'm trying to get a reality check from others because I realizing it's not healthy to keep score. Am I reading too much into this? I'm feeling really disappointed and sad about it, like we were probably not friends after all.

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