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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wife here. I am in my 40s. My libido is through the roof.

You mentioned resentment. I think honestly it is easier after so many years to fantasize about someone with whom you don’t have the daily grind and friction. Three kids is a lot, she is probably overwhelmed mentally. How much are you around with the kids?

Re: not opening the marriage — you seem to have strong feelings about that. My husband and I have discussed it and although I don’t know what that would look like, I’m not completely opposed as I might have been at one point. For one thing I don’t think I would leave my husband. But different relationships bring different life perspectives. Maybe things feel stagnant after a while with the same person because you need to grow as individuals.[/quote]

I was reading something in bed and I asked her if she had ever come close to cheating or if she even just bumped into someone that she would’ve made out with or slept with right then; she said she’s met/noticed really handsome guys before but never.  Then she asked the same of me and I said that I’ve had a few flirtations but never came close. 
She asked me why I was asking her this and I told her I was just curious but I let her know that if it ever happened I almost be happy for her after 25 years of marriage and that it wouldn’t be the end of the world for me, she replied the same to me. She said something about how at this point she was secure with our life and that some outside fun wouldn’t threaten anything.  
She’s semi-open to it I guess but I’m not interested in watching the kids so my wife can go out on a date, if we did anything we would do it as a couple.

[/quote]

PP here. That’s about where I am… after so many years your spouse is family and not going anywhere.

At our age you have to cut the BS. I confessed to a friend recently about a harmless exchange that I think would have been more at a different time and place. She said that it’s healthy to keep that energy alive. Life is to live open heartedly and without fear. I believe in honesty and loyalty too much to cheat. But if you feel it and you’re able to be honest with yourself about it then you can learn from it.

Anyway, sounds like your communication is solid and you trust each other. So just take it from there.[/quote]

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