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[quote=Anonymous]DH has been on a steady decline ever since we got married, he does less and less and less. We have 2 young kids. His parenting consists only of putting them in front of the TV for hours. He will often forget to feed them meals if for some reason I’m not home at mealtime.

He holds down a part time job. We do not have sex. He has ED and several other health problems but won’t get them treated. We are in our 30s and only married for 7 years.

We spent 8 months in therapy and if anything I feel like it set us backwards.

The problem is, if I leave him he will get the kids half the time and they will live in filth and do nothing but watch tv and eat fast food.

Is there anything I can do to try and turn this around? If I actually did leave him, would it motivate him to change?

Things I’ve tried:

1. Counseling
2. Scheduling him doctor appointments, arranging childcare so he could go. He twice pretended to go to the doctor (even lied about the visit when he came home) but I later learned he no showed (when I went to ask the doc for bills for FSA reimbursement ).
3. Threatening to divorce him (to the point of showing him paperwork)
4. Completely backing off and living in the same house but operating independently of him (this is where we are now and how we spend most of our time).
5. Going on vacations without kids (no sex, we talked about things and he promised to get help and then never follows through).

Is there anything else to try? Clearly he’s depressed, but won’t consider even seeing a doctor via telehealth to address that. [/quote]

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