Reply to Minimal amount of secret drinking

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]1) His sobriety (or lack thereof) is his journey. You cannot police his sobriety.

2) There is clearly something wrong in your marriage. Maybe you would benefit from marriage counseling.

3) Do you want more kids? Even if it means raising them by yourself? I only have one because I didn't want to have another with my then-husband. Now I am 40, divorced, and wish I had more kids, even if it meant being a single parent of multiple kids.[/quote]

OP here - thanks for this perspective -

1) I agree, and I don't want to police his drinking. But in the situation I described finding a water (wine) cup - it's not like I'm going to pretend I didn't see it. We need to be able to communicate openly.
2) We have not done counseling yet but recently agreed we should and we're going to set up an appointment hopefully within the next couple weeks. We need to work on our communication. Do you think struggling with alcohol definitely means there's something wrong in someone's marriage? 
3) In my heart, yes, I suppose I would want more kids even if I end up alone. I certainly hope that we can work things out though and stay married. I love him very much.[/quote]

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