Reply to Advice needed regarding maintaining friendship with close friend with severely disabled child

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "Advice needed regarding maintaining friendship with close friend with severely disabled child"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, you sound wonderful. I know it's hard not to take it personally and you must be wondering at what point your friend will kind of wake up and get back to life, including friendships.  It's really hard to say.  There are a couple of things going on.  First, I agree with a PP that she basically has to mourn a child and the expectations of a "normal childhood and life" for her DS.  So she's going to be what seems unreasonably disinterested in your DS' life because it's a complete reminder of where her DS should be exactly.  Second, there's her daily life.  I have a child with mild SN and it entails a lot of intervention, appointments, etc.  So I can only imagine what she has to deal with.  When she says she can't imagine one more appointment, even if it's for her and would benefit her, I'm sure she's telling the truth.  I don't think anyone can understand it until you live that.  It's got to be a huge, huge drain and just doesn't leave her with time/mental energy to take care of herself let alone nuture her friends.  Pregnancy and having a baby may be a wonderful blessing for her but it will also be another drain.  I think it's going to be years yet before she's in a position emotionally, physically and practically to be a reciprocating friend.

As for where it leaves you and what to do, I can only say I hope you both continue to reach out to her and yet protect yourself emotionally.  It sounds as though you're really doing your best to be understanding, not take it personally, and not be offended.  I'm sorry you're not getting the validation you deserve (by her acknowledging your help, showing interest in your life and child, etc.).  I think she just can't right now.  I would just stay in her life by reaching out to say hi via email and phone even if she doesn't get back to you.  Just "thinking of you" is nice.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics