Reply to Miserable mom with eating disorder (again)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I posted about my mom back at thanksgiving. She was at my house and acting miserable and refusing to allow anyone to be happy or have fun. She doesn’t eat anything and makes comments about others eating anything. Well I am visiting her now and she is worse than ever. It is so hard to be around her. She makes me so uncomfortable to eat anything in front of her. I have bought a box of crackers and hide to eat them because I am so hungry, but she has cameras all over the place too, especially pointed at her kitchen! I wanted to have some breakfast this morning, but she washed and put all the dishes away before she went upstairs. So it would be awkward and uncomfortable to try to get something because she will notice “the mess” if I do get something. She is also a “clean freak” who gets upset about messes. I want to cut our relationship off, but she is my mom. She has been mean to me most of the time I have been here. The only reason I haven’t cut her out of my life completely is that my son loves her so much. Not really asking for advice, just venting. Last time I got a lot of support from dcum when I posted about her, and it did help, since I was struggling dealing with her so much.[/quote]

Hugs, OP.  I hope you are staying in a hotel, or drastically limiting the stay to a minimum number of nights.  Does her behavior get worse as time progresses?

MIL is like this too - she notices what everyone eats, and makes a big show of only eating half a serving (of whatever it is).  If we go to lunch, she has to share a plate. Which is fine, but she likes to make a show of it. It is kind of exhausting because you know she is judging.  But after a while, you really just don't care.  Take care of yourself, put your self first, and limit your exposure. When you son gets old enough, he will see what is really happening, and will form his own opinions, without you saying anything. Only do what you can.[/quote]

Thank you! I am staying with her. I am leaving earlier than I planned because of the hostility she is showing towards me. Your mil sounds exactly like my mom. She told me that her doctor gave her a case of ensure because her weight is so low, but she doesn’t even drink that. She just talks about it like she is so proud of how underweight she is. She will order a sandwich and eat one fourth of it and then get mad and roll her eyes and shake her head when her husband orders what he wants, and comment that he doesn’t need all of that. She is very mean to him too. She has almost zero patience, and I think it’s because she is hungry. She doesn’t sleep well either, so it makes her even more impatient and angry.[/quote]

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