Reply to Long-Distance Divorce, Primary Custody, Frequency of phone calls and visits?

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Long-Distance Divorce, Primary Custody, Frequency of phone calls and visits?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm going through a divorce where my ex will live on one coast and I will live on the other. He agrees that it's best for our 6 year old son to live with me primarily. (He is a very loving father but does not have his life together and can barely take care of himself.) I want to foster a good relationship between him and my son, and I know he misses our son terribly and wants to see him as much as possible. He's very sad we will be living on opposite coasts and is in a bit of a tailspin about it. I'd like to set some sort of expectations so that not everything is "we will see." We are also trying to do this without court involvement, if possible. What is reasonable for phone/video calls with dad- maybe twice a week? What about visits? (Remember, he is young and can't fly alone that far.) I was thinking dad could try to come here maybe 3x/year and I could take son to other coast maybe 2x/year. Am I totally off base? I'm hesitant to commit to something like full summers there for kid, as his dad really needs to get his life together before that makes sense. I also don't think my kid would be able to go that long without me as he's quite attached. I mean, I'm sure he'd survive, I'm not trying to be self-centered, but it would be very hard for him emotionally as I know he feels more secure/safe with me. Just trying to get a sense for what others have done in similar situations, what is reasonable, etc. (Side note- child support is not in question here. We have a written agreement that neither of us will pay child support and I intend to honor it.)[/quote]

He will survive just fine without you while he is with his Dad.  This is really about how you feel going without having your son.  How do you think it will be for Dad only getting supervised visits a few times a year.  With all the maybe's and only limited phone contact, it sounds like you are cutting your ex out of his son's life by moving cross country and limiting visits/calls.  Why can't you stay on the same coast area for your child's sake.  He needs both parents, not just a visiting Dad a few times a year supervised by Mom.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics