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[quote=Anonymous]OP, my SILs and their families and I are night and day.  MIL makes it worse by her blatant favoritism.  We have bent over backward, now we are done.  We have our own family to worry about, and frankly no one is worrying about us.  We  have only ourselves to rely on.  After all we have done for them, the ILs have made it abundantly clear that they are not interested in showing any form of thanks.  So we are moving onward.  The children are becoming old enough to form their own opinions without any input (either way) from us, which is fine.  They made their choice, now they will have to live with it, it is out of our hands.  You need to decide what is best for you.  They are who they are.  Unfortunately, this might include selfish and self absorbed.  So be it.  It need not concern you.  Don't let it.  Do things in vague terms so they can not find fault.  Example: buy a gift card and be done with it.  They can pick out what they want, and you have fulfilled your obligation.  Of course, some people find anything to complain about!  [/quote]

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