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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So my DC noticed a gift to (be going to) their friend and responded - [b]"WHAT?! They never give us gifts!?!"  DC is right.[/b]  We don't need anything or want anything, in all seriousness.  But DC notices if someone forgets their birthday or whatever. Especially if DC has gone through the trouble of choosing a special gift for their friend.  We try to emphasize that it is not about the gift, it is about the friendship.  Then DC responds "then why does (child) always bee line it for my toys when they come over?"  DC is pretty astute, so it is hard to retort what essentially makes sense.  I have nothing to prove DC wrong, but would like to.  We seem to teach our children differently than our friend teaches theirs, which is fine, but I have no answers.  It seems DC feels like DC doesn't matter to friend, which seems quite sad.  A hand made card would really be best, and in keeping with what our house is trying to convey.  I am not trying to sound martyr -ish, just out of ideas.  Any help please?  [/quote]

Your kid is right - stop forcing them to pick out and give gifts to friends.

If it's about the friendship - then why are you giving a gift? You are really teaching your child "see what great people - we give great gifts and tons of accolades! everyone thinks we are so fabulous, see how they complimenting us! And we so great - we never ask for anything in return!!!".  Not to mention the awkward situation you put the other family in to always being receiving but never allowed to give.

Exchanging gifts for occasions with friends is fine to do if you both want to and if you don't, then just stop.[/quote]

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