Reply to Pros v. Cons: domestic and international adoption

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[quote=Anonymous]For me, it was helpful to try and decouple facts vs. personal preferences (or opinions or bias). I recommend speaking with experts who work in the adoption field in addition to adoptive parents.

Generally speaking, the following fact-based considerations apply: 
With international adoption, you are working outside of US systems. Unless you have contacts with deep and extensive networks in the country you are adopting from, in many countries, there is no information on the circumstances which led to the child's placement for adoption. Obviously there is limited information in the US, but there are guidelines in place in terms of TPR and documentation, etc. 
If you are considering infant adoption, usually the children adopted from overseas are older. Typically the youngest kids adopted from overseas are 2-3 years old. In the US, newborns are often placed with adoptive families. There are plenty of older children in the US that are adopted too.
In domestic adoptions, you can choose to either adopt transracially, a child the same race as you, or open to either depending on circumstance.  
Many US adoptions are 'open' which means visits and/or communication with the child's biological family.

Below are my spouse and my own personal opinions and biases which influenced our adoption journey:
Experience with friends and families members who adopted domestically. It was something that we had familiarity with before starting the adoption process.  
Preference to adopt at newborn age
Anecdotal scenarios with families who adopted overseas who felt misled and lied to on the circumstances around the child's background
Anecdotal experience with adoptees sharing their identity struggles and desire to understand where they came from

Wishing you the best. I know adoptive parents who have adopted internationally, via the foster care system, and privately; who all say it is the best thing they have done.

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