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[quote=Anonymous]OP here.  First off, I want to be clear that I'm not just being cheap.  Really, we've beeh happy to buy nice Bar/Bat Mitzvah and graduation gifts for the children of our friends and friends of our kids.  Nor am I averse to registries in general.  The line my mom and MIL used when they got us to register is "Your friends know your tastes, but there will be older relatives and friends of ours who would like to give you something, but won't know what to get."  OK, fair enough; the registry makes sense in those cases.

So, now that we're the older generation giving, not getting, I have no problem going to Crate&Barrel, Pottery Barn, etc. and ponying up.  I'm just surprised when I see 3 sets of dishes and multiple kinds of glasses, etc.  And, in part, what makes me surprised is that this generation -- the Millenials, if you will -- have been touted as being the give-back generation.  Many of them have raised money for all kinds of causes, and we have happily supported them.  In fact, now, when the need is so great, I thought some of them might ask for gifts to be made to a charity in celebration of their marriage.  Instead, I just see acquisitiveness and consumerism raised to a very high level.  And, no, I don't live in a shack and eat off paper plates, but as several PPs have noted, our expectations as newlyweds were more modest.  Particularly  in light of the fact that these couples are out of college and grad school, working in high-paying jobs, and, in several cases, own houses, I'm just flabbergasted.

I'll be very embarrassed if my kids follow this course.   And, no, I don't think that wedding gifts are a way of recouping your expenses in putting on a reception.   [/quote]

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