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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Anyone have tips on how to stay an interesting person to know, rather than slipping into becoming a mom who only talks about the kid(s)?

I have 1 daughter, toddler age. Sometimes it's hard for me to find stuff to talk about with people that isn't kid-related. I think it's mostly covid - travel and overseas living was a huge part of my life and identity before and i often talked about that. I also had a bigger group of friends before and had larger gatherings, which make it easier to let others lead the conversation.

Once I'm sucked into parenting conversations with other parents about kid minutiae, it feels rude to change the subject. There's always work, but I work in a field people don't find intriguing and I don't want to fall into the workaholic DC stereotype. I am a younger mom (late 20s) and most of my same age friends don't have kids. So I'm very eager to keep an identity separate from motherhood. I have many hobbies, but I don't want to bore people with those, either.

[b]I guess I'm sensitive to this because I'd like to fancy myself a modern, dynamic woman who's still sexy and interesting, and my own mom was very absorbed in motherhood in a way that turned me off the idea at first. [/b]

Tips?
[/quote]

[b]My tip would be to work on your issues around this. Kierkegaard used to say that he would much rather talk with an old woman retelling family gossip at a party than anyone who considered themselves to be remarkably interesting, and I think there's something to that.[/b]

Many women in this day and age struggle with the shift of identity that comes with motherhood, regardless of whether they work or stay at home. But you don't have to be having great adventures out in the world to be interesting. Interesting is about how interested you are in others and in life.

Signed, mom who used to travel all over in remote areas and doesn't feel less interesting now[/quote]

I agree with this, but hadn't heard this line before!  I find people interesting who are enthusiastic about something, who are curious about the world and the people around them, and who isn't uptight or always thinking about the impression they are making.

Ultimately, the way that you avoid talking about kid-related stuff all the time is to...not talk about kid-related stuff all the time.  That's a common place to start if you are in a kid-related environment, or where that's the first thing that you know you have in common with someone, but that doesn't mean that you have to keep talking about that.  You can make connections to related topics.  You can ask people questions about themselves to find out if they have a hobby or something in common, or that you'd like to know more about.  You can ask if they've seen any good movies or TV shows, or read any good books, or cooked something new, or whatever.  What are your hobbies?  Why don't you think they can provide common ground for conversation with others?  If you just talk *about* them, that would be kind of boring, but that's just a matter of having a conversation v. monologuing.  [/quote]

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