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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My friend has a 3 year old who does not behave. I know kids this age push boundaries, but you’re supposed to teach them right/wrong and discipline them when they don’t listen. She does not. Her child has been over at our house for the lady couple of weeks and is a terror. He never listens, will yell back if I tell them to do something, and will even curse at me.

Examples are

One day I told them ( my child is also 3) that they needed to turn off the tv and eat lunch. He proceeded to scream that he didn’t want to. I told him a stern voice that these are the rules in my house and it’s lunch time. He then told me he doesn’t like me and starts throwing a tantrum.

Another time they were playing at the park and we needed to leave. He again started screaming and then told me “ f u”.

I told his mom and she just says         “ he’s little and learning. He doesn’t understand things yet”. I get it. My 3 year old has days where he won’t listen, but we try to discipline him with redirection, eye level talks explaining things, and time outs or privileges ( no tv time) taken away. I don’t want this kid at my house anymore because it’s too stressful.[b] I feel I will lose the friendship if I tell her that her child is not welcome in my house.[/b] [/quote]

You might. You could try presenting the decision diplomatically. If you are babysitting for her, just tell her you can't anymore. If the kids are having a play date, suggest meeting somewhere else. If she wants to do it at your house, say "I know I might be old fashioned, but your Larlo really doesn't like to follow the rules I have. I think we'll all get along better if we meet a the park instead."

What you can't do is discipline someone else's kid, or criticize her for her parenting. It's very possible in a few months to a year, he will mellow out. It's also possible that your discipline style is just not right for him (e.g., there are other ways to get preschoolers to follow directions besides using a stern voice and telling them it's your house). I think if you accept that you and the child are just not a good match, and take on some of the responsibility of that, your friendship, if it is genuine, will survive.[/quote]

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