Reply to What We Can Learn From the Dutch About Teen Sex

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[quote=Anonymous]I think the PP makes a good point about kids needing an excuse to say "no" -- to themselves or others.

On the other hand, I agree with the poster who points out the hypocrisy and ultimate selfishness of "not under my roof" ("I don't care horrors my children experience so long as I'm not exposed to any potentially embarrassing behavior on their part.")

Overhearing your parents (or your children) having sex is certainly cringe-inducing, but it is also a normal part of life. I heard my mother having sex many times and I'm pretty sure she inadvertently got to hear me once or twice (when I was an adult staying with her). And while I take precautions to the contrary, there is a good chance my daughter has heard me having sex. My mother was a single mother, as am I, so -- the horror -- none of this filthy, loud sex was between married people.

I am not saying that's great. It is good for kids to grow up with their mother and father. By no stretch of imagination is hearing your mother and her boyfriend (or your daughter and her boyfriend) go at it a positive or enriching experience (it's gross!). But it is not the end of the world either.

The best part of the article for me was when it talks about how the Dutch place relationships between teenagers in the context of love. They don't dismiss their kids' feelings as "raging hormones", and don't assume that teenagers who engage in sex are any less moral, responsible or loving than teenagers who don't.

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