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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My stepson is marrying a lovely young woman. We are AA/mixed AA. His fiancée is mixed AA raised by her White mom in various WV (mostly), Ohio, and Western PA small towns. Mom had a decent pink-collar profession and I’ve gotten the sense that while money was tight, there was not poverty despite the one income. And SDTB has often talked about the economic gulf between her family and that of classmates as the main source of mistreatment in the community growing up. However, stepson recently told DH and I that his fiancée’s BFF told him that there was almost constant very overt racism towards the family in HS and that’s why his fiancée was allowed to graduate a year early. We’ve always wondered about that as she graduated and then took a gap year without anything to show for it or a health issue. Stepson asked her mom and Mom confirmed that the atmosphere in HS was so bad that the counselors allowed her to double up on some classes so she could finish in three years. She also said that at least two of their moves were to escape threats of violence from racist neighbors or schoolmate’s parents. Mom feels her daughter wants to pretend everything was jealousy over the family’s slightly better economic status and she’s nervous to contradict that narrative. Stepson is unsure how to proceed and so are we. I think he should bring it up in their premarital counseling sessions, but DH thinks there’s likely a fragility there best untested. [/quote]

Oh my god....you are going to be skewered, OP. This is so not your place. You don't know how to proceed? How on earth is there anything for you to do or say on this i issue (from high school, by the way). This poor woman. Does she realize how everyone is talking about her, including her own mom, apparently? I wish she were the one posting; she's the one who needs the advice.[/quote]

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