Reply to Divorced dad needs advice about time with my children

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[quote=Anonymous]I would not force them to come.

Do you want your kids more? Lots of times a parent complains about stuff but doesn't actually even want to take the kids more.

If your points are accurate and you've never been physical with your kids - did you ever grab at them or yank them, turn them, etc., then you will likely need the help of a psychologist and the courts in stopping your ex and rebuilding with the kids.

Why do you think your ex is doing this?

I would still go. Tell the kids the plan before - we will do x, y and z in this order at these times. Pick fun and public stuff. Go to pick them up but if they don't want to come don't get mad and don't force it. They didn't ask for a mom like this and they might feel they have to believe her and go along with it if she is primary parent.

When with the kids just say that didn't happen or other simple things if it comes up but you can't circumvent all behavior of disordered people. Just keep showing up as calm and steady voice of reason and truth but don't blame your dear kids. They didn't create this.[/quote]

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