Reply to “Parenting philosophies”: do you think we’re judged IRL like we are here?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a really sweet compliant first kid, and then a large enough gap that he was an only child as a toddler.  I'm a profession where I see a lot of families who are struggling, so I knew going into parenting that temperament played a huge role, and had the perspective to know that my kid was easy because it's who he is, not because of my parenting.

But one thing that I noticed was how quickly people assumed that the fact that I got what seemed like good results, it must mean that I parented the way they did.  So, they would sometimes snark to me, for example, commenting that the kid melting down about leaving the playground was "overtired" and his parents needed to sleep train, even though in fact they had no idea whether that parent, or I did sleep training.  It happened that I didn't sleep train, because my kid was already sleeping decently at sleep training age, but the judgmental parent assumed I must.  Another mom might have seen the same thing and commented that that kid wasn't attached like "ours"   . . . but in reality that wasn't it either.

When my lively determined force of nature second kid came along, people stopped making those to me.  I kind of figured they were making them behind my back instead.  [/quote]

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