Reply to reconnecting while stressed from TTC (cross post)

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[quote=Anonymous]PP 14:13 again:

I just wonder if he's feeling very peripheral to the marriage right now and ignored. You're understandably hugely engrossed in this process...what is left for him to do besides provide sperm on a schedule? I'm not saying it's RIGHT for him to feel this way, but I can see how someone MIGHT feel that way.

It's not that canceling might make him feel more involved in the marriage, but it might offer an opportunity for you to get more involved with HIM. He can see your energies directed towards his needs. Not to be sexist, but I think men are really sensitive to this notion of being ignored. They need reassurance.

It's just a tough situation, though, OP. I feel for you. I wish there was that secret potion. But unless one of you is willing to make a change -- and he's not the one posting here, so I can only suggest things you can do -- then I don't know if it's going to get much better. Just don't get invested in protocols and schedules to the detriment of your relationship. God willing, whether you have another kid or not, you'll still have each other. A sure relationship-killer is contempt, which is very close to resentment.

I hope this next cycle is the one that does the trick! [/quote]

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