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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is so kid-dependent, but even my sweet, even tempered older teen DD did what your DD is doing at that age.  It's hard not to take it personally and I found myself thinking wait I'm just doing the same thing I've always done, why suddenly is it all wrong?  But don't take it personally and beware that your DD will get even worse.  But you'll have times when she's momentarily back to being sweet and fun and those will be the little nuggets of wonderful that keep you going.

And one day she'll emerge from the drama and self-centeredness of adolescence and be a different person.  You'll miss the old sweet little girl, but the new woman will be amazing.  [/quote]

You've described my experience with DD who's now in college.  Looking back, I feel lucky that we escaped much of the drama and even pain that friends have described with their daughters.  I think we benefited from the following:

1)  DD played sports, which gave her a strong sense of identity and confidence;

2) She had a terrific group of friends in HS -- not the popular girls and not interested in playing those games;

3) She was active in service activities (working at a camp for kids with cognitive challenges, church trips doing repair work in WV), which helped her feel competent and able to help others.

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