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[quote=Anonymous]How much do you really know about anorexia? You seem unfamiliar with interacting with someone who has anorexia, yet you're making generalizations about how this friend's personality is like other anorexics.

It's possible this friend has borderline personality disorder, or that the way they deal with anorexia manifests in a similar way, but they are quite different as actual issues, and I don't know that there is a lot of crossover unless the person actually has borderline disorder separate from anorexia.

In general, people with anorexia lie to keep their food issues hidden. They might lie about already having eaten, for example. If absences or hospital stays were due to the illness, then they might lie about that to keep anorexia hidden as well. But they wouldn't typically be lying about other things and should be easy enough to get close to on other topics.

It's not easy being friends with someone who has anorexia because they are dealing with an internal battle. It might be about control, self-esteem, anxiety, fear of not being loved, etc. Either way, it's hard, and it's helpful to try to be compassionate. That doesn't mean you should get sucked into things that are bad for your own mental wellbeing, but also try not to drop them as a friend. They might really need you in their lives, even if in a limited capacity.

I suffered from anorexia, and what I wish most is that people in my life had talked with me about it when I didn't recognize what I was doing. Two people mentioned it to me and suggested I should get help - and I only knew each of them vaguely. None of my close friends brought it up, none of my teachers, neither of my parents. My doctor didn't believe me when I mentioned it and got huffy about having to do bloodwork to see if I was pregnant because I hadn't been having my period due to weight loss (instead of helping me). I didn't lie to people - I was just secretive. What I did lie about what to the two people who asked me if I was okay, and I said I was fine. But over time, it sunk in that I wasn't, and that was only because of what those people had said to help jolt me out of it. I'm grateful to those people to this day and have told them so repeatedly.[/quote]

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