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[quote=Anonymous]I agree with following kids eat in color but I don’t think as the pp is saying that you’re doing quite what she would recommend - she recommends you as the parent are in charge of the menu (and the menu usually doesn’t change once dinner starts) BUT that it is of course ok for the child to choose not to eat what’s on the menu AND you always try to be respectful in the sense of including a “safe food” - so banana, etc whatever you know would be a safe food (but switch it up) is on the menu from the beginning, included with the other food out. The child can eat as much or as little of what’s on the menu without any pressure either way (haven’t eaten anything else offered at dinner but want a second banana and we have plenty - sure! No questions or comments). Only time you would limit is so that others have their share or if you genuinely need it for another meal etc. but generally they choose how much or how little to eat of what you serve. But ideally you do choose what is served.

If you want to take this approach, I would talk to your daughter first “I know you haven’t been super interested in some of the options for dinner lately, that’s totally ok. It’s up to you to listen to your body and how much you need/want. I’m going to work hard to make sure there is something on the menu each night that you like, and you can always have as much of that as you like, but once we’re eating I’d like to stick with what is on the menu and not change it mid dinner” talk through any concerns she has. And given her age maybe she can help sometimes pick the safe food, but move it before dinner. Then if she wants to switch mid dinner you just talk about how that isn’t on the menu tonight. [/quote]

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