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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s attention seeking. Just because it’s not working doesn’t mean it’s not seeking.  It’s immature but, as you point out, she doesn’t have a lot of people in her life paying attention to her and so if she’s feeling that need she has to try to get it from somewhere and you’re her only source.

I would do what you’re doing and let her know you’re giving her space so she can’t write a narrative in her mind about how you’re neglecting her.  Then when things are good (not when she’s doing this because you can’t reward this behavior) try to do something that demonstrates you’re “paying attention” like send her a book you read you think she’d like and talk about it, or (post Covid) go do something different together like a lecture or a hike.  Hopefully if her bucket is a little more full, she’ll stop looking for negative ways to fill it.

Also, caretaking is hard and thankless and it is also *your* dad, so maybe consider whether there’s respite care or another way to get her a break?[/quote]
Yep, agree. attention-seeking. There is likely a whole fairy tale in her head, just as it is in the heads of all those like op's mom.[/quote]

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