Reply to Am I just bad at having a nanny?

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[quote=Anonymous]I always thought we'd send our kid to daycare and last minute decided on a nanny when I was on mat leave, and ever since, I have felt like I made a rash decision when interviewing while in the newborn/postpartum haze. Now I'm a year and a half in, and I still feel stressed about our nanny pretty regularly.

- She has given me zero reason not to trust her, and yet I still have irrational fears that she's going to run off with my child and never come back.

- She is great with my daughter -- she loves her -- but she can be quiet and standoffish with us. But then other times she's engaging and nice. I really think this is just her personality, and in fact, one of her references warned me of this.

- I really don't consider myself a micromanager or Type A, but it bothers me that she is inconsistent with his schedule, or keeps him at the playground for hours on really cold days, or feeds him snacks late in the day and spoils his dinner. I know from reading these threads that these are minor issues. I also think my feelings are heightened because of WFH and being home to notice every little thing.

- I need a nanny as I work (and I wouldn't want to be a SAHM!) but I find myself relieved on Saturday mornings when it's just us, and on edge on mornings she's coming.

- She can be rude, quiet and cold. Not all the time, but regularly.

- She can be demanding about what food I have for her, etc.

On the other hand, she's super prompt, has raised lovely children, she's very clean, works hard. For what it's worth, my husband is never stressed about her.

I wasn't raised with a nanny. Please help me -- am I crazy and maybe just not great at having a nanny? Or are we not a good fit for each other? If it's the latter, I have no idea what we'd do because she's given us no reason to let her go.

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