Reply to Everything was great for 6 months and then family finds out and boom: he ends it. Advice?

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Reply to "Everything was great for 6 months and then family finds out and boom: he ends it. Advice?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I am early 40s divorced with kids. I met someone in early June. It was going very well…like just wonderful. He progressed the relationship forward; I was hesitant. At the very beginning, I was like, are you sure you are okay with dating someone who is divorced with kids? He said it did not matter repeatedly. I also asked if he still wanted to get married and have kids the traditional way. He said he was no longer thinking about kids and did not think marriage was in the cards now (which was a perfectly fine answer to me). I did not need to be super serious and was just spending off-kid time with him.

He is a three years younger and has never been married or had kids. He is not from the US. I am familiar with the cultural background.

That said, he told a sibling about me and all hell broke loose. I do not know why he said anything. We were not at a serious stage. He still wanted to see me at first (so we continued a few weeks) but then he saw some family in person and came back and broke up with me via a text and then a video call right after. I am so shocked he did not expect this level of backlash. I did. Which is why I would not have said a word unless we were super serious and we just were not there yet. He said he missed me after the break up. I did see him one time since the break-up (because when he did it, it was not in person—text plus a video call) to get some clarity and I got a little but not much. I kind of regret seeing him afterward because it now feels like maybe I derailed a possibility of changing his mind. I have gone dark now.

Did I dodge a bullet here? I can’t help but think this ended prematurely. He said he has not felt this way about someone before and expected the backlash but not this much. I am super disappointed. This screams to me a lack of relationship experience to me. There was literally a 180 degree turn in a very short period of time and it is super upsetting because I raised issues about my status early on and would not have pursued it if he truly could not handle it. I asked about family pressure to marry and have kids in the first several dates. I knew I would not be acceptable…but we were not at a serious point, so I just don’t get how he misjudged the reaction to this level. He said he was excited about me and wanted to tell them—but now it killed it. I never plan to tell my family about anyone I am dating unless it got to a serious stage, which to me, is a minimum of one year. Should I just think that this happening earlier was for the best and forget about any possibility of reconnecting in the future?
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