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[quote=Anonymous]You don't get a lot of sleep as a parent, even when hey are older.  In fact the toddler years are in many ways far easier than elementary years.

So how exactly do you plan the day to work?  Here's how we did it in the before times

2 kids , one in elementary one, one in daycare.

DW gets up at 5am and goes to work early, getting to work by 6am. Works till about 3pm, solid day of work, then is at school soon after release (but kids are still in extended day) and picks up from daycare.  Takes kids to after school activity such as soccer practice or scouts, then gets home and cooks a very simple dinner like mac and cheese and steamed brocolli.

DH gets up at 6am, makes lunches, probably cleans up from the night before, and then kids get up at 7am.  Head out at 8 to do 2 drop offs, elem is kiss and ride but preschooler is a much more involved walking in, reading a book, hugs process.  Drives to work and arrives around 9am, works until 6pm.

Most everyone aims to be home by 6:30 - 7:00 PM, but one parent has to be home much earlier if you want to spend any time with your kids.

Dinner as a family is ideal, but DH sometimes misses it and eats after we are already finished.

Then we spend time in the evenings together, talking about the day, probably helping with homework, doing chores like cleaning up dishes, laundry, washing lunch boxes, picking up toys.

Then 8:00PM is the bedtime routine (some kids are earlier) and kids are asleep by 8:30 - 9:00 PM.

DW essentially goes to bed then, because a 5am wakeup means a 10pm bedtime is still only 7 hours of sleep.

DH often stays up to do a few more chores or putter around as men are wont to do, and is in bed by 11pm-12pm.

Rinse and repeat this over the week, some days DH leaves work early b/c two activities for two kids at same time, and either makes up time in evening or takes annual leave.

Weekends are largely consumed with some big activity (soccer game, day trip to apple picking, etc), grocery shopping, household cleaning, yardwork and home reparis, church, and family board game or movies, and some trips or walks as family.

Date nights happen saturday night when we hire a sitter to watch the kids at 7pm and we head out for dinner and entertainment.

No nearby family.  No money for a nanny/au pair.

Its definitely a slog; summers are actually worse because of the patchwork of camps you have to build your schedule against.

So does this sound "bad"? If so, plan accordingly.  I've been trying to talk my spouse into one of us SAH and moving to some far excurb.  Remaining working spouse would have super commute, but I honestly that would be less exhausting for everyone.  But our aggregate wealth would be much much lower, which can affect retirement, support for our kids in the future, etc.[/quote]

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