Reply to Some concerns about wedding, house and kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How will you pay for a wedding and honeymoon with no income or savings? [/quote]

Well it sounds like her boyfriend has money.  Maybe there is money in their families too.

1.  If you want to get married, get married.  have a small reception now and when Covid is more in control, you can have a big reception in your country of origin.  Don't worry about a honeymoon right now.  These things dont' matter in the grand scheme of getting married and really should not be weighing in on your decision to get married.

2.  Yes you want your name on the deed.

[b]3.  It really doesn't matter what your parents or his parents want.  If you both want kids right away, start trying right away.  If you want to enjoy married life or get  your finances in order first, do that.  You two should be the only ones deciding when the right time to start trying is.  
[/b]
I say this nicely OP, but you need to become more independent before you get married or have kids.  Your entire thinking process if very juvenile and you seem to be very dependent on what others think. [/quote]

Wrong. I say this from the perspective of someone who deals with heavily traditional immigrant families (and OP clearly is living at home at 35) - the parents wishes matter a lot. If they aren't taken into consideration her life will be hell - from her own parents or her in-laws.

If she takes them into consideration in this choice, she could easily make her life far easier. It sounds like they like the boyfriend/fiance already so the hard part is over. Once they are on board for a low-cost wedding or civil ceremony - immigrant parents will often pay for the new family's start on life. House, baby daycare, or a car etc.

Don't give advice if you don't know the backstory.[/quote]

Yes, because giving into the emotional terrorists' demands is a great way to live your life  :roll:

Boundaries, people. I say this as someone from a "traditional" family who tried to make my life a living hell. Now they'll never see me or my kids again. Their loss. [/quote]

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