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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry, that is so hard.  Your mom sounds like she is severely depressed, and unable to see beyond her own pain and grief.  I would contact hospice and ask them what they can do.  You can also contact her physician, if you know who it is, and share your concerns.  The doctor can't tell you anything, but can listen.

You should also look into some kind of support group or counseling for yourself, even if it's virtual.  You cannot be responsible for your mom and her grief; you need a space to process your own feelings.  It sounds like you are reaching out to her and staying in contact, which is good, but you can't make her get help, you can't "snap her out of it."  [/quote]

+1,000,000

It’s so hard, and I’m so sorry. The truth is, there’s little to be done beyond what you are already doing - staying connected, reaching out, and offering support as you can, as you balance the needs of your own family and working life. Your mom may be making decisions that are harmful to her well-being, or self-destructive, but they are her decisions to make.

I echo PP’s recommendation to see a counselor and/or support group to help you work through your own feelings. That’s ultimately the only thing you have control over, and it can help enormously to have a sounding board, and just that space for yourself.

A geriatric care manager who is also a social worker might be a good person to talk to - they work with so many people in your situation; it’s extremely common, as isolating as it feels. The LBD association might have some resources for virtual counseling or family support groups. [/quote]

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