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[quote=Anonymous]We are Indian-American. Tolerance and taste for spices comes over time. When they were little, I was making fresh baby food for them (rice, lentils, veggies khichadi) that was mainly Indian but I was not going beyond a smidgen of turmeric, cumin and salt for their food.   My kids were very reluctant to have spicy food that had heat in it, or that had a distinctive smell like asafoetida or fenugreek herb  when they were younger.  Obviously, we were making Indian food at least twice or thrice a week at home, so we had to really make sure that we were careful in what spices  we were putting in em.  Restaurant foods are oily and spicier. And even if they can adjust for hot spices, they very rarely will adjust the quantity of oil, ghee, butter and cream.

I would say that telling the restaurant that you need zero heat (no mirch, and no garam masala) will go a long way in cutting down the heat. They are used to non-Indians not being able to eat spicy food. Usual fare like  Palaak paneer, butter chicken, palak-corn, butter paneer, shahi paneer, aloo-dum, baigan bharta, daal makhani etc will work. The raita given at most places are not to my kids liking. It should not be so sour or tangy.  We make amazing raita at home.

Easy things to learn at home -  daal, daal makhani, cholle, rajma, rice, peas pilaf (or any other veggi pilaf), raita, sauteed cauliflower (gobi bhujia), okra, eggplant bharta, gobi aloo.  The base for most north Indian curries can be made by onions, tomatoes, ginger, garlic, cilantro, deseeded green chillies,  and for spices just have  -  turmeric, cumin, paprika, cardamom, coriander seeds.    You can make seriously delicious food with just these spices.

I have converted many of my kid's friends to Indian food because they have had food at our house and experienced the "flavor explosion" of home cooked Indian food. [/quote]

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