Reply to I have to beg or ask my husband 50+ times for everything. what should I do?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Get someone else to help you with the attic stuff, (girlfriend or hire someone) or, get a little tree and some ornaments at CVS.  If you get someone to help you bring down the attic stuff, don't put the stuff back up there.

The broader issue is to create a LIFE--YOUR LIFE-- where you are not begging your DH to do anything.  It is not fair, and it sucks, but it will help YOU feel better and not trapped by needing him to do this sort of stuff.

With respect to household repairs, just get a handyman.  That was the best decision I made when I was in your stage of life/marriage/young kids.  I had the handyman come when my DH was at work.  I even had the handyman set up our (live) Christmas tree.  DH would pout that he didn't get to pick it out, but if I waited for him, it would be a New Year's Tree![/quote]

+1.  I was going to say the exact same things including the fact that it isn’t fair.  However, you need to be able to live your life and move forward the same way you would if you were divorced or if your DH was on travel.  What would you do in that case?  It’s more about not feeling helpless and ultimately getting done what needs to be done rather than putting energy into trying to change someone that isn’t going to change and not having anything to show for it at the end of it.

And if there is anything that impacts your DH directly or solely, do not take it on and let him deal with the consequences of inaction.  Like if his parents are coming for Thanksgiving and the bathroom needs to be cleaned and the xyz done, be clear you are doing x and if he wants y done for his parents it’s up to him.  Assume he is a competent adult that can get done the things he wants to get done (I assume he has a job where this happens) and keep it moving.[/quote]

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