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[quote=Anonymous]15:19 again.  So, this book (http://www.amazon.com/Children-Self-Absorbed-Grown-ups-Getting-Narcissistic/dp/1572245611) really helped me figure out constructive ways to respond. In essence, it says that if you want to keep an NPD in your life - not everyone does - you have to learn to consciously manipulate them. The behavioral techniques I picked up from this book absolutely work and have helped me have a decent, if nowhere near normal, relationship with my mom.

Also, if there are children involved and you want to be helpful to them, the best suggestion I can offer is to reflect back to the kids what normal parents look like and help them see that their parents' anger/bad behavior is a) wrong and b) not their fault. The hardest thing about being a kid in this situation is that you have no idea that other people don't live the same way, and when your parents are cruel, you think you deserve it. Cannot stress how important it is to see healthy parent-child relationships as a way to expose the parents' denial. That said, this is kind of a tall order and unless these people are relatives, you may not want to take this on as a responsibility. It's a lot to ask.[/quote]

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