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[quote=Anonymous]So my brother has debilitating personality disorder, and his therapist recommended a course of treatment that was a little unorthodox and would potentially cost a little more to implement.

Brother lives over disability income and a small trust from our parents, and I am careful to set boundaries and only speak to him on circumspect schedule and only give money as part of birthdays or holidays generally.

Since his therapist recommended this course, and my brother was worried about the additional cost, I said I would help with covering the costs since the it is therapist recommended -- the therapist signed off on my additional involvement despite my concern of bending boundaries.

Well brother has started this new regime, but there are additional things he keeps coming up with, such as he needs new notebooks for journaling (rather than just the pads of paper he has now) or needs new clothes because it is getting him out of the house more and he doesn't have enough to wear, or he needs a new winter coat since he goes on walks with the group (socially distanced) and his current coat was only good enough for walking to and from the car.

I am pushing back at this, and regretting I didn't specify a concrete amount I would help but I just slipped up since I was hopeful this treatment would be a step to him getting better and maybe even getting back to work someday -- though now that I see how he is handling even this modest change I suspect he will never work again, which means there will be future problems when his trust runs out or his car breaks down.

Thoughts on how to re-establsh appropriate boundaries?  Should I talk to therapist?  I pushed back on this additional "needs" to support therapy, and he hung up on me. [/quote]

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