Reply to DL school refusal--out of ideas

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Reply to "DL school refusal--out of ideas"

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[quote=Anonymous]I agree that the responsibility angle is like speaking another language to him right now. School is an extreme non-preferred activity. I would set smaller, achievable goals (like one class) and reward the heck out of his attending. (Be specific about what “attending” means. Sitting up in front of the computer maybe, or being in the room. Paying attention 100% or staring at the screen is probably not realistic.) And then let him earn an immediate reward. Milkshake, French fries, 15 minutes of Minecraft - right away. (Charts and points are not immediate enough for many kids.) Do this until he can consistently do it most of the time and then increase to 2 classes. If the rewards don’t work, what privilege can you make contingent on attending one class? (Again, make it achievable.) You don’t get your iPad time until you sit through one class, or video games or whatever else is his currency. Rewards are better, but removing privileges can work when rewards don’t. He will throw a fit and have a tantrum (perhaps daily) but if you persist through that, it will work. (If he thinks the goal is not achievable, have him pick one that is. Like half of a class.)

Also, I really recommend looking up Seth Perler and resistance. He has done some great podcasts and videos on helping parents overcome kids’ resistance to non-preferred activities.[/quote]

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