Reply to Feels like my parents want to use DD as a prop for their social lives

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Two months ago, I gave birth to DD (our first child, and the first grandchild for my parents). My parents live five hours away, and they've come down to see us three times since the birth. Everytime they come to visit, I can't help but feel like they are just using her as a prop. They take a ton of pictures, which is obviously all well and good, but they don't really make an effort to play or interact with her. They may play with her for a few minutes here and there, but then they'll go back to being on their phones, or going on their laptops to do work. They've never really offered to do anything to help out with her when they are here. Similarly, they don't ever ask to Facetime with us to see DD, but they always make note to say that they showed all the pictures they took of her with their neighbors, friends, etc.

Am I totally off base in that it just seems like they want to take a bunch of pictures and be able to do the "fun" stuff that comes with being a grandparent?[/quote]

Playing with her a few minutes here and there is totally appropriate for a two-month-old baby.  They can't play.  They can't Facetime.  It's not necessary for them to be in the baby's face for hours at a time; frankly, babies aren't that exciting.  Also, some people are really into babies, and some people aren't.

Have you asked them to do anything?  "Hey, can you keep an eye on the baby while I take a shower/go for a run?"

Also, a reminder that being a grandparent is primarily about the "fun" stuff.  They raised their kids already.  [/quote]

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