Reply to Talk me out of adopting as a single woman

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Talk me out of adopting as a single woman"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I was 35, very single, really wanted kids and realized I was putting a ton of pressure on myself to get married and have babies, and had absolutely no control over either of those things.  So I took them off the table.  I decided that I would be ok if I never had kids, that I would appreciate the wonderful things about my life.

ironically, I got pregnant about 10 months later and ended up having a baby at 36.  I won't lie to you - it is hard.  It is hard even with the dad in the picture (he's the dad but we are no longer together), and it would be harder without him around, both financially and logistically.  If you don't have the money for nannies or a good support system or family in the area, it can be incredibly hard to parent without a break.  (if your kid's in daycare all day, you feel like a sh*t if you get a sitter in the evening.)  I have my daughter 5 days a week and sometimes I am just exhausted, physically, mentally and emotionally.  there's never enough money, there's never enough time and I miss certain things about my child-free life, like time to myself and dating and going out whenever I wanted to.

That said, being a mom is amazing.  My kid is incredible.  I've never known love like this before - it feels like the beginning stages of a passionate love affair at times - I just can't believe sometimes how much a person can love another person.  But that doesn't happen overnight, and you have to go through a lot of dirty diapers and spit-up and sleep-deprivation to get to that point.

So it's worth it, but you have to be really sure this is what you want, or you could spend a lot of time second-guessing.  and if you still hope to find "the" guy, honestly, you have a lot better shot without a kid.  single parenting is 24/7 and dating is VERY hard to fit in.  So be sure you're ready to choose a kid over a guy.  I thought I was ready for that, but some days I'm still not 100% ok with it.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics