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[quote=Anonymous]   Can anyone relate to this who has a history of being the target of a verbally abusive parent?

Couldn't find an old thread on the weird almost positive side of surviving verbal and emotional abuse from a narc or borderline parent and the strange deranged positive result of building resilience. I once again got feedback today on how well I handled a very abusive client and de-escalated the situation during a video conference. It was in a way a little bit of re-traumatizing, but it also felt so normal. She could not manage her emotion, just like mom, so I stayed calm. I tried to get to what the actual issue was and ignore the nastiness. I admitted something I had done that seemed to make a situation worse. I was able to de-escalate the situation and end with a plan going forward.

I am drained from the meeting, but nothing like the drained feeling I got dealing with my mother and her abusive anger tirades. I could sometimes de-escalate those as well, but at least in the workplace with witnesses people do eventually get down to business. I do still go into little girl mode where an inner voice tells me I deserve the treatment. Luckily as an adult I made a good choice in who I married and I have gotten away from some pretty crazy workplaces. While I won this client over, I will give her to someone else the first chance I get.[/quote]

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