Reply to If your spouse has mental health issues that are not fully controlled

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is interesting to read as I feel I am the spouse with some serious mental health issues. Sometimes I want to end it all to alleviate them or anyone having to deal with me at all. [/quote]

Don’t feel that way, I would never want him gone from our lives.  I’m not going to lie, it’s a challenge to co-adult with a struggling person, but he still adds tremendous value to our kids lives and I’d never think we are better off without him existing.

The one thing I do really wish he would do (it’d go so far) is engaging in solving for how to make our lives work given his challenges.  My dh can’t even discuss it bc he feels attacked and has to acknowledge his failures. I wish he’d partner with me and say “ok you can’t count on me to take the kids for a bit every weekend so you can get a break too, so let’s work together on figuring out ways we can make sure your needs are met.” [/quote]

I’m glad you feel that way and it sounds like a like a good plan. But as the person who isn’t managing mental health in my relationship I feel so much guilt and shame for what I have done to him and our child. I have a therapy appt this evening, but don’t even want to go. I am pretty certain I am a complete lost cause. [/quote]

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