Reply to Is being married and having children a barometer of success?

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Reply to "Is being married and having children a barometer of success?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'd be interested to hear what OP thinks of as a "good guy". I sense that most of the good guys she is thinking of are high earners, which is problematic.

But even if the definition is broad, I don't really agree. I am married to a great guy and we have a wonderful kid. But I don't view any of that as "success" -- it's a combination of good luck and making choices to do things we both wanted (getting married, having a kid). I think it's a highly personal choice. I know people who made different choices, or who had different luck, and I don't consider them less successful than me. Some of them are more successful because they have more interesting and better paying jobs, for instance.

But I usually evaluate success as a career metric. I don't think it's the most important thing in life, nor the least important. I have not been very successful, though I do have a great family and am a good spouse and mother, so that counteracts some of my feelings about my lack of success in my career. And they are probably even related -- I likely would have made different career choices had I been single and childless.[/quote]

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