Reply to Helllppp!!! Child won’t listen unless I yell

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, this is a very common problem. Kids love to tune out the stuff they don't want to hear.

For tasks like hand-washing, I try to focus on the progression of events. Larlo, once you wash your hands, you get to go play the numbers game with the tutor. Or Larlo, once you wash your hands, its time to go to the park. Often kids don't want to do these little in-between tasks, but if you can remind them that the next thing is better, you get there.

Another thing to pay attention to is how much time you spend giving your kid directions. If it's a lot (wash your hands, put your dish by the sink, go get dressed, etc.) you may need to come up with a different approach. Reward charts are great for stuff like this. What are the things he has to do every morning before school? Create a chart with those tasks, tell him that once they are all done, he gets a reward (it can be really simple, some stickers or a bowl of Bombas, whatever your kid considers a special treat that is still within your parenting philosophy). It works! Instead of giving an order, you can ask questions like "Have you finished your chart?" or "What's the next thing on your chart?" It gives him some autonomy and motivation and frees you both from a rhythm of giving and taking directions.

And if you can reduce the amount of order-giving you give during these high friction times (usually getting ready times and transitions), you may find your kid listens a little better to other dictions because he no longer feels like he's getting orders all the time.[/quote]

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