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[quote=Anonymous]You have to socialize pets and children to each other proactively, and make sure they both understand what is okay behavior and what is not. Your dog doesn't normally growl because he probably never gets picked up by anyone other than you and your spouse, and he trusts you. He is probably still suspicious of your kid because kids don't always understand boundaries with animals and you need to be very intentional about teaching them.

As soon as our daughter was mobile and could understand directions, we started socializing her with the cat. We chose moments when the cat was relaxed and happy and would say "See how he is calm and his tail isn't twitching? See how he is lying down and not eating? That means it's a good time to visit him." Then we would let her give him a few gentle pets. The minute the cat seemed annoyed, we taught our daughter to back off. Likewise, if our cat is ever bothering out daughter, getting in her personal space or trying to sleep in her bed, we gently remove him and say "Nope, that's not a good spot for you" (we say this is for our kid's benefit, not our cat, obviously).

Our kid would never just walk up and pick up the cat, and if she did, the cat would raise holy hell. I get that you have more leeway with dogs because they are usually a little more tolerant of kid behavior. But that means you need to be more vigilant of training everyone on boundaries, not less. The dog obviously doesn't like being picked up like that, and you need to explain to your kid why it's not okay and not to do it in the future (without punishing him for doing something he couldn't be expected to know not to do).

Pets are actually a great way to teach kids how to read body language and to respect other people's boundaries. We have an only child but she socialized really well when she started school, I think in part because she already understands how to read people and not to push people's buttons.[/quote]

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