Reply to If you are in a long-term partnership and not marrying, what are your reasons?

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Reply to "If you are in a long-term partnership and not marrying, what are your reasons?"

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[quote=Anonymous]Thought I would chime in even though my situation is a little different. My husband and I were together for 8 years before we got married. I would have been fine not getting married but it was important to my husband (he is from a more conservative background than I am). I was and still am very ambivalent about marriage-not ambivalent about my husband or our relationship (I love him dearly), but about marriage itself. My parents went through a very acrimonious, traumatizing divorce when I was a child and it really impacted my view of marriage. Plus, there weren't a lot of happy marriages in my family in general.

As an adult, I've seen a number of people get married because it was the "thing to do" and you still get a lot of societal approval from being married versus it being about the relationship itself. There are some women in particular who still seem to need to be married in order to feel complete-kind of a "checking off the boxes" sort of thing even if they are past the point of wanting to have kids. This is going to sound cold, but I look at marriage as a legal contract. Being married didn't make me feel closer to my husband and it didn't change how I saw our relationship but it did change how other people viewed us and how our relationship was perceived legally. [/quote]

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