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[quote=Anonymous] I have a 5 year old only. First, absolutely only the amount you spend on other kids. It would be incredibly unfair to everyone for one kid to get a $150 gift and the others get $50 gifts. It's not about fairness to the parents for spending, it's about fairness between the kids. They don't understand overall spending, they just see the difference in gifts and that looks like preferential treatment.

Second, and let me say this loudly for the people in the back, it is HARD not to spoil an only when you are comfortably middle class. Our only is the only grandchild on one side and the only grandchild of that sex on the other. This kid blinks at a toy and there is a line of well meaning grandparents and aunts and uncles lining up to buy it for them. You can't hide it when they're talking about it on a Facetime call, and it makes it really difficult to teach them not to be greedy and entitled (which is a normal development stage for all kids, not an only child exclusive) when they say "boo" and an Amazon package arrives two days later. So for me at least, my only needs LESS stuff than the other cousins because they get 99% of what they want unless I specifically jump in and say "thank you, but please don't buy that just because my kid asked for it."[/quote]

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