Reply to Sibling rivalry- how to foster good relationships?

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[quote=Anonymous]I am getting increasingly worried about my oldest (5 years old) and how jealous she gets of her 3 year old sister and 5 month old brother. She was relatively fine before we had the baby but lately she has been saying that she is stupid and we don’t love her as much as her siblings. She likes it when we yell at her sister when she gets in trouble (which is often) because she isn’t getting in trouble. She thinks our love is a competition and that we can only love one of them. Of course I tell her none of this is true but what else can I do other than consistently tell her we love her, we love all 3 of them and it’s not a competition? I have the book siblings without rivalry and will read it but in the meantime what should we do?

FWIW the pandemic and coronavirus has really affected her. She was very very upset and acting out a lot in March and April. Things have settled down a lot in that area but I am wondering if this is just another manifestation of her anxiety regarding life. She has had a tough year with lockdown happening right after we had a new baby, canceling her birthday party because of the virus, pulling her from daycare and all her friends. I just want my kids to have good relationships with each other. My sister is my best friend in the whole world. [/quote]

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