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Eldercare
Reply to "Disengaging from sibling, when older"
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[quote=Anonymous]I'm in my 50's and my sister is in her 40's and I empathize w/ your post OP. In my case I am drawing new (long overdue) boundaries to protect myself and my family from her alcoholism and the decades of family dysfunction that grew up w/ and have turned out to be perpetuating. I've been in therapy for 2 years and it is the only reason I'm finding my way. Among the things my therapist has said to me that have been profoundly helpful are: - a quote (which I will butcher for sure) about how if you want something to change, just observe it. Don't try to force anything, or control what is beyond your control, just observe what is happening and how you are responding to it. The more conscious you are in those moments the more able you will be to manage your experience of them. - the simple act of you changing how you respond will have ripple effects throughout your family system. They might be tiny ripples, and slow to reach the shore, but there will be effects.[/quote]
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