Reply to Is refusing to date or marry outside of your race/culture considered racism?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think it’s racism.  I also think you are lumping together two very different things.   I am white and Jewish, I would have no problem dating Jewish POC, even though they are relatively uncommon.   I know I would have bigger issues dating a white Christian.   To me a desire to date within your culture or religion is very natural.

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Ditto. Race doesn't matter to me in that way. Religion does. I was committed to marrying a Jewish man and raising my kids Jewish (and I did). I wouldn't have had any problem dating a Black Jew or other Jewish POC, but I have very rarely met any. And I wouldn't have had a problem dating a Black Christian man if it were just dating, but I always preferred to date for marriage, not just the dating experience, so that would not have been fair to him.

My sister for years dated a lovely Hispanic guy who was wonderful. We all loved him. He fit into our family so well personality-wise. But he was very committed to his Catholic faith and in the end that was a deal-breaker for them both.

I think if someone says "I wouldn't marry a ___" person it could be racism, or it could be recognition that one prefers to be with someone of a similar background. Without knowing the circumstances it's hard to say. I had a friend who said she just couldn't date a Black guy but she couldn't come up with a reason, just that it "felt weird." That's racism.
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