Reply to Feeling so lonely and overwhelmed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In your circumstances I think I would be feeling the same but I think there is some misunderstanding here about marriage and there seems to be something important missing here. First of all. When you marry, your family becomes his and his family becomes yours. So when you visit, you all visit your family everyone goes most of the time or at least that is my understanding. Maybe DH doesn’t have this picture.

Not sure exactly how the marriage took place but there is usually a ceremony which sort of puts all that in place. But maybe there needs to be some clarification and understanding about this. Don’t personally know of any good resources but I have two suggestions. One is to read the book Ready to Wed, even though it is after the fact it is an eye opener for marriage relationships.

Second, here is a number-855 382 5433- you can call that also might have resources as well as names of counselors, should you feel this might help. I personally think it might.

Next point, I think you may need to learn to be a family. You seem to be missing out on the blessings of the family relationship. Your children need this. Your husband also may be having difficulty changing his picture of self from single to married with children. He might need some help in this and your family will be the beneficiary. There are good things ahead if both of you can get on the same page. I am praying for you to discover and live out the fullness of the blessing of marriage and family. You all deserve this. God bless you.[/quote

I very much agree with your suggestions -- but am questioning your take on DH.  OP seems very isolated, has no friends, and her primary social contact used to be with her mother.  Why are you assuming that it's "DH(that) doesn't have this picture"?  It's just as likely that OP has held back from involving herself -- and possibly their children --from their extended family.

OP, I would encourage you to identify two or three people that you can reach out to for social interactions.  Start small, and within your own comfort level.  Are there people that you could text, email, facetime, or call a few times a week?  This could not only form a basis for deeper relationships, it could begin to establish a rhythm of social contacts and connections for you and perhaps even give you something to look forward to.  Because of stay-at-home habits, it might be fairly easy to connect this way at a time when many others are also connecting this way vs. face to face interactions.  I have friends that send pictures of what their kids are doing, or recipes and pictures of what they're cooking, or reminders re: free movies.... It's not about the information as much as it is making consistent efforts on all sides.

OP I hope that posting here is a way to get support -- and help you feel at least a tiny bit less isolated. [/quote]

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