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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. I don't plan to file for a divorce. I am trying to understand if there is a way to save our marriage. For many reasons 1. because I still love him and cannot throw out 15 years of life together like that for the goal of splitting the assets. 2. Our son enters high school this year, applies for college in 2 years. He goes to private school, wants to be successful in life and get into a good college. At the moment he is in his room, with his desk at our marital home. Somewhat strained relationship with his dad because he lives in the basement. But all in all our son's life didn't change as we remain civilized and don't argue. I cannot initiate a divorce until his college plans are final, college is financed etc. 3. I am work from home mom: we build a small real estate empire during marriage that I manage and generate income. 50/50 partners. Also, my husband has interest in foreign companies being a fund manager. Divorce like that will be expensive and messy. I am not prepared for that as of now. 4. My grand father had a child out of wedlock, but it didn't prevent them reconcile with grandmother and live happily after that until he died. Being from former USSR where there are less eligible men than women, I believe that people can still work on marriage and I do feel that my husband still has feelings to me and is not rushing for a divorce himself. 5. The lady who I suspect is his mistress comes across to me like a beautiful blond corporate bitch. My husband probably sees that none of the comforts of traditional family with wife cooking, being submissive, taking care of him, being tender, forgiving etc. would not be available if he was to marry her. He gave her shares in his company, and I suspect she's waiting to "cash out" when the company is sold, while maintaining an affair with him.

It is a very complex situation, with many variables. I do know that I need to lawyer up of course and be ready just in case he files.

Can someone recommend a good lawyer, a good trust attorney, and a brand for the voice recorder for his car? I don't think my husband is seeing someone in the US, the mistress  is likely  overseas

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