Reply to Wish I could find a way to enjoy this time more

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, first, be kinder to yourself.  I am also working a full-time job with my two little kids at home and this is hard.  My husband helps a lot (some days he does more than 50%, otherwise it's pretty even), but it is still so difficult.  I'm a tax lawyer and I LOVE my job.  I have never considered quitting because I enjoy it so much and also the perks it provides for our lifestyle are a consideration as well, so I totally get you.  However, with all the postponements and extensions (federal and all 50 states plus DC) and round after round of new legislation not to mention daily guidance coming out it has been one of the more stressful times of my career.  I still love it, but it has been really hard to deal with everything else on top of work.  (We normally have a nanny but are paying her to stay home now because she is in a high-risk group and we cannot ask her to sacrifice her health for us).

One of the things I have been trying to do is schedule the day so that I can give whatever I'm doing my all.  There's just no way to effectively multi-task both my work and being a mom (or being a cook, cleaner, etc.).  So when I'm working, I'm working, and I don't apologize for that.  My husband and I schedule all the calls and meetings we have so we can try our best not to overlap but when that happens, the kids FaceTime with the nanny or grandparents.  Otherwise we have blocks of the day when certain things are getting done.  So I will pick an hour to do something with my kids, for example, and during that time I'm all in - no phone, no distractions.  Then after that I go back to work and they can color or play in the yard or whatever.  Then we'll take a break and have lunch together.  Then back to work.  Etc.  It's not perfect, but it helps me feel less guilty about the times when I need to work.

Also, our motto around our house is to survive, not thrive.  Sure, some people are living their best lives right now, and good for them.  I'm trying to find joy in the little things, like the ability to have lunch with my kids and husband every day, or even the fact that I get to wear stretchy pants to work now.  But I wouldn't say we are excelling at anything, nor are we going to come out of this better people.  My kids miss their friends, I miss my co-workers, etc.  We had an awesome and not so busy life before, so we're not one of the families loving the fact that we're not rushing around all the time, because we didn't do that before.  And it's ok if you're not enjoying this.  It pretty much sucks.  Be kind to yourself.  [/quote]

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