Reply to If your parents divorced when you were an adult, was it traumatizing? and if so why?

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[quote=Anonymous]My parents divorced when I was in my early 20s and it's still pretty awful in my late 30s.  It started with the emotional burden of having to support each parent separately - both parents were depressed and had trouble rebuilding their lives for 7+ years.  Both have financial challenges.  Both have had new relationship challenges and new spouse challenges, and there are not clear boundaries for how much they share/overshare and rely on their adult children for advice and support.  One of the new spouses is an absolute nightmare and has ruined my relationship with that parent.

It is absolutely logistically challenging to split time between the parents and there are battles and hurt feelings when it's not precisely, perfectly equal.  Also, if you have a partner whose parents are married, how do you divide time between your partner's 2 parents who are together, and your 2 parents who are apart (3 sets of parents)?

It's awful and I hate it.  I feel like my life and my parents' lives and my siblings lives would have all been so much better if they could have just figured out a way to stay together.  One of my parents didn't try hard enough to make it work, and it took me a decade to realize it was the one who looked like the victim at the beginning.[/quote]

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