Reply to Can someone explain the mindset of someone who gets cheated on and stays?

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Reply to "Can someone explain the mindset of someone who gets cheated on and stays?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How can someone watch their significant other burn down their relationship for a fling or affair with a new person and...be ok with it and stay?

What goes through their mind?[/quote]

Well, nothing was really burned down.

Why stay:

- don't want to lose half my money, pension, assets
 - don't want to lose time with the kids
 - don't want to do all the child-rearing myself, this is a two-person job
 - at the end of the day, I'm fond of my spouse 
 - when viewed against the total reality of family and marriage, where a person puts his genitals is a minor thing.  I mean it's unpleasant but if he remortgaged the house or stole marital assets, it would be much more of a crime.[/quote]

So back to first response - no self confidence.

You think it's only about 'putting genitals?"  What about respect for your marriage, your family?[/quote]

I don't really know what you mean by self confidence.  [b]I am perfectly confident in my ability to carry this family alone. I just don't want to.[/b]

Everyone has a different definition of respect.  I've noticed that sometimes on this board there is a great deal of anger toward women who admit to staying with their adulterous husbands. I am not quite sure why.[/quote]

Np here and to me that makes sense as well as the poster who didn't want to see her kids half the time.  I also think that many women won't admit it but that years out from an episode of cheating ( no long term serial cheating but a fling), if they eventually left and divorced, that they regret that they did so and wish they had stayed and worked it out.

Divorce and remarriage is so hard and it's really hard on the kids.[/quote]

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